Dilemma
Every parent is faced with many crucial decisions throughout parenthood, whether to breastfeed or bottle, stay at home mum or working mum, which nursery/preschool, which school etc. The list is endless. Some of these decisions are easy to make, some are more difficult.
This week I have suddenly been faced with a huge dilemma I had not predicted. My twins start school in september. I have always thought my twins should be in separate classes when they go to school, to help promote individuality etc. However, on my way to a meeting at the school on Monday, it suddenly dawned on me, just what this meant. I was feeling quite upset at the thought of them being separated, I have no idea why, as I have always tried to treat my twins as two individuals, so this feeling was very unexpected.
Obviously, I want to do what is right for my children as all parents do. I believe this is definitely one of those more crucial decisions to make, which could seriously affect them. I have written more about this dilemma here on my other blog if you fancy having a read.
Parenting is difficult, you have your children’s lives in your hand, you are responsible for how their life progresses, we all want to ensure our decisions are the right ones for our kids.
This is one dilemma I need to get right!
I can see that it is a dilemma, but know you’ll assess all options thoroughly and make the right decision! I know of two sets of twins off to separate high schools this year, because they’ve had enough of always being known as ‘the twins’ #WotW
Thanks, yes, I can see when they are older things will change (just as it should do), it’s just what to for the best at the moment. x
A difficult one, and I can understand why this has been your prevailing dilemma all week. Having just read your other post, and having found that research, the pressure to ‘get it right’ must be mounting. I’n not a twin parent, but I do know that you’ve done a great job with your girls, and I don’t doubt they’ll do well whichever choice you make. Hope you can decide soon and are happy with it so that you can relax x Thanks for sharing with #WotW
Thank you, I am every nearly decided to keep them together now, having weighed up all I’ve read and heard other peoples stories, I think that may be best for my twins.
Hmm I can’t imagine having to make these sorts of decisions – I suppose when you don’t have twins you don’t realise some of the impacts it has on parenting choices.
All I can say is there were quite a few sets of twins in my primary and secondary school (all but one were fraternal). None of them were split up and they all made friends easily – some friends overlapped but each individual ‘twin’ had some separate friends too. I’m also still friends with one girl from high school who was a twin and they have always said they were glad not to be split up. They were beautiful confident girls with their own sets of friends, but she said when they first started knowing they were near to each other and there for each other gave them the confidence to make new friends without feeling scared or alone.
Anyway, good luck making your decision it must be such a tough one but I’m sure whatever you decide will be the best for them x
Thanks for that, it’s good to know twins will still have separate friends too x
You hear so much about how twins are so bonded that they practically finish each other’s sentences and its difficult to really grasp what that must be like. I don’t think they need to be separated at this young age but I’m sure will evaluate the pros and cons based on your own knowledge of your children. X #wotw
Yes, I don’t think my twins are as close as some, but they do still like being together, so it’s difficult to know when to separate them, maybe when they are a little older and understand more
It is a dilemma- I’ve taught twins together and apart and it really depends on the twins (not helpful!) if they can play with others as well as each other and not get jealous if the other twin is of playing with other friends it can work well. And you can always ask to swap classes later on if there are problems?
Thanks, my twins do play well together and separately, so fingers crossed they’ll be ok
hmm really interesting, and I’m sure really tricky, as with everything parenting all you can do is make the decision that feels right to you and that you (and hopefully your grls) will be happy with! Best of luck making the decision! xx
Thank you x
Do you think yourtwins will like to be separated? Or will they want to stay together? I think even if they are quite young it pays to listen to what they have to say too and maybe just maybe you can decide from there if you are still allowed to put them in the same school. #wotw
I have asked them, they said they want to be together (as I expected)
What a hard decision. I know you find the right answer. If it helps there were twins in my daughter class and they got separated when they split the class and they thrived
#WotW
Thank you x
It is a dilemma isn’t it…..It really is a tricky decision to make! I’m sure you will decide the right thing for your girls x
Thanks x
Gosh that is a tough one. My daughter had identical non-English speaking twins at her nursery and when they went into reception, they were split up. I don’t know them so don’t know how it’s going, but maybe it’s school policy anyway? All will work out fine and they’ll grow and develop either way, I’m sure. Good luck!
Thank you
It certainly is a dilemma. I have no sage advice only go with your instincts. You know your girls better than anyone and will make the choice that serves their needs best x #WotW
Thank you, it is tough, I’m sure they’ll be fine whatever I decide x
That is a dilemma and as you say, something that you want to make sure you get right for your twins. In the US school that my son is at, they change the class groups every year, and at the school he was in in Scotland, at the end of Primary 1 (reception) they merged 3 classes into 2, is there the option of keeping them together for reception and seeing how it goes, then reviewing at the end of the year?
They could be split in yr 1 instead of foundation, that is another option
This is a dilemma, I don’t know what to suggest but if they want to be together then I’d suggest that and as others say you can always move one of them as they enter year 1. Not in the same league but I have to decide whether to have my daughter and her best friend at preschool separated, her friend has become a bit bossy and my daughter is seeking a lot of reassurance and answers from her friend since being bullied a few months ago. Thankfully the bullying has stopped and preschool have asked me to decide if I want my daughter in a separate class to her friend to stop the reliance on her friend, I don’t know?
That is a tough one too. My friends daughter is extremely shy, but she started school in a class where she didn’t know anyone and she was fine.
That’s a tough one. I wish I had some words of wisdom to share. I know whatever you do decide will be the best for your girls x #WotW
Thank you x